Essays, Memoirs, Writing courses

Windows – An Essay

Writing Course, Day 4 Windows, Baudelaire (year-long practice with extra prompts). I find I really enjoy incorporating the prompts and the challenge of putting all the words into a cohesive thought – but quickly and with sudden inspiration. Does anyone else wonder at where these thoughts even came from as they spill out of you from these prompts? lol
Middle aged, bending, legend, weep, proud, i am
WORDS FOR THE WHOLE MONTH: THOUGHT, ORANGE, +brave
WORDS FOR WEEKS ONE & TWO : REGRET, PALM, KNIFE
Windows
What do my neighbors think, if they see me through my living room window at night? Lights dim, reflection of the simulated fire, silhouette of a middle-aged woman bending over her laptop. What do they think I’m up to, here alone in my house? The lonely widow, working away at something…chatting with friends? Watching youtube videos?
Do they know that I’ve reached peace with myself and my life? Do they know that I write and write until I feel I’ve come to the place I was meant to be? I weep, I chuckle, I amuse myself night after night, day after day, pursuing whatever it is I am meant to do and be.

I am proud of my diligence, for once. I have no thought for others’ opinions, finally. I am brave enough to spill my all on these blank pages. No regrets. I will slice open a vein and let these thoughts fill the page – bright orange thoughts that were pulsing in my mind all these years. I hold my own future in the palm of my hand. I alone can tell my story.
Is there a story? Time will tell. Will anyone want to read it? Who cares? Truth or legend, I will write what needs to be said.

Watch me, neighbors. Watch the strange woman who pours out her guts in front of you all. You have no idea the storm that rages within this quiet, unassuming house. You have no idea the cacophony of words that spill from my fingers onto this page. Go about your lives and let me sit, here in my window, discovering the universe and its secrets.

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